"laestadian, apostolic, gay, lgbtq, ex-oalc, ex-llc, llc, oalc, bunner" LEARNING TO LIVE FREE: Cambodian Mennonite Laestadian

Friday, January 14, 2005

Cambodian Mennonite Laestadian

My husband, raised by cerebral skeptics, finds my history with the OALC interesting, kind of like he finds the orangutans at Woodland Park Zoo interesting. He is kind, he is tolerant, he is occasionally clueless. Case in point: the first (and only) time my parents visited us was after our first child was born. We tidied the house. We put the TV in the basement. We welcomed them warmly and took photos of them with Baby (their sixty-somethingth grandkid). We made small talk. We ordered out for pizza. And then my husband graciously offered Dad . . . a beer. A BEER! Might as well have been moonshine.

Dear hubby has many talents, however. While courting me, he invented this silly song and we still have fun with it. Our children are going to forever associate Laestadians with Tolstoy. Perhaps that's not such a bad thing.

To the tune of "This Old Man, He Played One"

This old Cambodian
He plays the accordian
He plays the accordian all over Cambodia
With a wickety wackety pickety packety
Give the dog a bone
This old Cambodian plays the accordian all over Cambodia

This old Mennonite
She plays the vibraphone
She plays the vibraphone all over greater Los Angeles
With a wickety wackety pickety packety
Give the dog a bone
This old Mennonite plays the accordian all over Los Angeles

This former Laestadian
She reads Anna Karenina
She reads Anna Karenina from the beginning on through the end of it
With a wickety wackety pickety packety
Give the dog a bone
This former Laestadian enjoys reading Anna Karenina

10 comments:

  1. Your beer story made me smile. I remember the first time I ever saw a beer. I was about 10 or 11 and was with a school chum. Her dad took us to lunch and ordered a beer. To this day, 30 some years later, I can still remember the guilt and terror of just being in the room with someone who was drinking a beer. I swear I thought the lightening bolt was coming on down! I have never been a drinker and can't stand to be around people that are drinking to excess. I guess I can attribute that to my Apostolic upbringing. My dr has recommended a daily glass of wine for my heart but even that is a chore. I'm lucky if I remember to drink it for about 6 days a month. My husband will never understand the weird wiring your brain is left with after a childhood in the church.

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  2. The innocent beer gesture on your husband's part is hilarious when one knows the background of the Laestadians. Funny thing is...so many of them drink!

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  3. Hilarious that beer story! :) What happened then? How did your father take it?

    Hey, I never heard Laestadians aren't supposed to read Anna Karenina! I've got it in my bookcase, in the original Russian, and I've even read it. Quite a job - such a thick novel. I know the Russian Othododox church didn't like Tolstoy, I think he was even excommunicated. But I don't think Anna Karenina is that bad after all, it's definitely not the worst kind of book I've read.

    Theoforos

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  4. Theo,
    What happened next is . . . well, I can't remember exactly, but we drank Diet Pepsi while my husband drank his Hefeweizen. This incident could be the reason why there have been no return visits!

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  5. To consider yourselves the only group with ownership on salvation I think you need some big ticket self denial items to set you apart from the worldies, with the Laestadians two of them are obviously drinking alcohol and watching TV. It doesn't bother me to hang out in a Bar or restaurant visiting as the people around me drink alcohol but I still don't touch a drop. So I know what you mean when you say that feeling of it being so wrong sticks with you your whole life. The TV thing is a whole different story though, if I could kick that habit I would be much more productive : )

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  6. The "alcoholic beverage" topic is an interesting one. Though I am not a drinker, and am not interested in spending time with drunks, I don't see the problem with an occasional drink or harmless and responsible social drinking. I understand there are even health benefits to consuming a glass of wine on a daily basis. I've often questioned why there are so many sins in the OALC - cannot people be trusted to use good judgment? This goes for other "sins" as well. For example, rather than preach and teach people that competitive sports is a sin, why not instead guide people to use good judgment, that exercise is a healthy activity, and helps to take care of the bodies that God gave us!

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  7. I know a former Muslim who still cannot bring himself to eat pork--must be the same with former Laestadians and alcohol.

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  8. Not so with me. I enjoy a wide variety of libations, especially red wine but also good scotch and the odd cocktail. I seem to have acquired the ability to accurately judge the probable effect of a given amount of coffee, tea or alcohol on my, um, nervous and urulogical systems. But some folks are not wired for moderation, and some folks (perhaps the Sami?) are predisposed to alcoholism. Abstinence is a useful option.

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  9. A Finnish-American scholar, Jim Kurtti, is of the opinion that the majority of Americans of Laestadian heritage (which includes some from Norway and Sweden) have significant Saami heritage as well, being that many Saami became Laestadian converts and broke away from their tribal roots and lifestyle. If you look at photos of modern-day Saami, I can see it may be true. My grandmother's family were rumored to have been "Lapps" at some point, but if you asked her about it, she always seemed a bit defensive and angry.

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  10. I could care less about drinking. The stuff tastes and smells disgusting to me but Paul tells Timothy in 1 Tim 5:23 to 'no longer drink water exclusively, but use a little (note a little)wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments'. It must have some good qualities in it for Paul to say that, plus it was Jesus' first miracle. Turning water into wine. If it was totally taboo He would not have done that. All the places in the Bible that I have seen that talk about drinking being a sin or wrong is the places where it talks about drunkedness. Paul tells Timothy in 1 Tim 3:3 that an overseer (a person in a place of trust) not be addicted to wine. He does not say that he can have none. Just because one person cannot control something does not mean others have to be told to not take part at all. It is an insult. The Bible condemns drunkedness, not having a little.

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