"laestadian, apostolic, gay, lgbtq, ex-oalc, ex-llc, llc, oalc, bunner" LEARNING TO LIVE FREE: Feeling Positive?

Thursday, October 14, 2004

Feeling Positive?

Last year, my husband and I took a parenting course on "Positive Discipline." The class uses an Adlerian approach to teaching effective ways to parent. With two toddlers, we wanted to make sure we didn't unconsciously imitate the dysfunctional parenting styles of our own parents: in my case authoritarian and in his case, neglectful.

Recently it occurred to me that how we envision the family, that small social unit of parents and children, is a key to how we envision our society, the world as a whole and our relationship to God. What is the proper role of parents: authorities or nurturers? Are children inherently devious or innocent? Or they to be molded into a shape, or encouraged to discover their unique gifts? What works best to teach limits, encouragement or shaming? Is the parent-child relationship characterized by power and control . . . or dignity and compassion?

There's a saying: to know all is to forgive all. When I see how my parents were raised, and what kind of parenting was reinforced by the OALC, I can understand why they became who they are. That helps.

To the commenter below from the OALC: please ask a preacher if you are supposed to shun (i.e., not associate with) worldlies or exmembers. Then write back, okay? I'm very interested in the response. Maybe things have changed.

1 comment:

  1. The thing here is the preachers will not admit that the Laestadians shun. They will deny that this is what is taught.They might tell them that they should stay away from ex-ones or the world for their own protection (not even realizing that this is shunning). How many times have you gone to the preachers and asked a question about something they preached about and gotten an answer like:

    I can't recall saying that
    I did not mean that
    I am not responsible for what comes out of my mouth when preaching.

    I and my husband have gotten those answers lots and lots of times. They will not stand by honestly what they say or preach. If it were based on God's Word they could.