"laestadian, apostolic, gay, lgbtq, ex-oalc, ex-llc, llc, oalc, bunner" LEARNING TO LIVE FREE: A Friend to Man

Friday, July 03, 2015

A Friend to Man

It's hot here in Seattle. This morning we were sitting on the porch drinking coffee and enjoying a brief hiatus from the heat. A siren wailed in the distance and the dog tried to imitate it, as he does, which is not very well. It's a dog falsetto. We laughed out loud while inwardly hoping that whomever or whatever beckoned the siren would turn out to be okay. Yesterday, an electrical failure in an apartment resulted in an enormous fire. It was so hot the firefighters had to be rotated out frequently to recover. Thankfully, the only damage was to property.

As we sat and sipped, a neighbor ambled by and asked if we would recycle a plastic container she'd found in the street. She was on her way to the hardware store. As I put the container in our bin, a fragment of poetry arose from the cobwebs of memory.  Something from long ago, when I lived in a remote house in the woods, far from any friends.

"I'll live in a house by the side of the road, and be a friend to man."

At the time, I thought of the poem as being contrary to what I was taught in OALC. After all, most of the church people I knew lived in the country, and invested only in loving their own kind, certainly not their neighbors.

But I'm sure that was a limited view. What were your experiences?

The House by the Side of the Road

by Sam Walter Foss (1858-1911)
There are hermit
souls that live withdrawn
In the peace of their self-content;
There are souls, like stars, that dwell apart,
In a fellowless firmament;
There are pioneer souls that blaze their paths
Where highways never ran;-
But let me live by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.
Let me live in a house
by the side of the road,
Where the race of men go by-
The men who are good and the men who are bad,
As good and as bad as I.
I would not sit in the scorner’s seat,
Or hurl the cynic’s ban;-
Let me live in a house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.
I see from my house
by the side of the road,
By the side of the highway of life,
The men who press with the ardor of hope,
The men who are faint with the strife.
But I turn not away from their smiles nor their tears-
Both parts of an infinite plan;-
Let me live in my house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.
I know there are brook-gladdened
meadows ahead
And mountains of wearisome height;
That the road passes on through the long afternoon
And stretches away to the night.
But still I rejoice when the travelers rejoice,
And weep with the strangers that moan,
Nor live in my house by the side of the road
Like a man who dwells alone.
Let me live in my
house by the side of the road
Where the race of men go by-
They are good, they are bad, they are weak, they are strong,
Wise, foolish- so am I.
Then why should I sit in the scorner’s seat
Or hurl the cynic’s ban?-
Let me live in my house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

23 comments:

  1. Sounds kind of like the old "Good Samaritan" story, right...where the priests etc. walk by, but the enemy "other" is the one who stops and cares for the injured person. I always felt that the point of the story was missed, but I didn't know why until I understood as an adult that the Samaritan was indeed "other". It would be like a fundamentalist Christian having problems, and no one helping except the immigrant Muslim neighbor.
    But this brings up the idea of community. the author Wendell Berry writes a lot about community, and the responsibility we have to each other as members of the community. A community that is made up of people who are all alike, and think alike becomes stagnant and ill.
    Unbeliever

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    1. Or like a LLC person having someone from one of the so-called "heretic" groups be the only person to help them.
      Unbeliever

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  2. It's all about the people.

    This is another example of how fortunate I was, growing up in the family and community I did. In small farming communities like ours, it did not matter what the religious, political, or other persuasion someone was, if they were in need, they received help from everyone. If a farmer was ill or hurt, neighbors from 20 miles around would pull in with their equipment and put in the crop or harvest it, or whatever needed to be done, all without any interest in being compensated. If a family was in need, the community did everything from quietly helping to organizing bake sales to help them out. In small communities, there are inevitable cliques, where people have had disagreements in the past over something. However, in a time of need, everyone pitched in. The theme seemed to be "Yeah I know he's an SOB, but he's our SOB, so he's gonna get help." Afterwards, the parties might resume not talking to each other. I recall barns burning down and the neighbors all coming to rebuild it -- and the only one being paid was probably the "head carpenter".

    Our farmhouse was never locked, because if a neighbor had car trouble, it was four miles to the next farm. If it's -30, that's a long walk. Many times, we came home from somewhere and found a note on the table -- "Had to use your phone -- thanks!"

    It's all about the people. If groups of people with a religious or other tie would refuse to help out their neighbors in this way, then they are not Christians, and should probably take heed of scripture -- "Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?" -- and wait for the answer.

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  3. Yes, it's all about the people, but its not the 50s anymore, now it's more about the times. People were not as lawless and violent as they are today. No road rage, no jumping over the counter, and then robbing the store and shooting the clerk in the face...gramps

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  4. I guess I'm completely missing your point. We were talking about people helping people and you go off on road rage and jumping over counter tops. Explain, please, how any of that affects whether people should help people.

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  5. People should help people, and of course some do. I was raised in the same kind of more or less innocent place and time as you were. But, as you know, things have changed, people have changed, today a child has to be taught to be careful about almost everything. It wasn't like that, in your childhood or mine. Maybe you still live in a innocent little town. But I'm overwhelmed with the daily news. So yes it is nice to reminious. You were talking about the past, I was thinking about the reality of my present.

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  6. The "daily" news is 24/7 now, and I suspect we are more aware of the evil excesses human nature while spending less time connected to the good.
    Not to be too paranoid, but I think our economic overlords prefer we fear each other and keep trying to buy our way to happiness. It keeps us from organizing an overthrow.
    In purely statistical terms, there has never been a safer time to be alive, or of military age. But you would never know that listening to the news.

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  7. I haven't lived in a small town in many years, and over the years have lived in some of the world's largest cities. Even in those places, I saw acts of human kindness on a regular basis. I've seen -- and continue to see -- this sort of thing all over. My experience in living in several countries around the world and traveling and working in many more is that an overwhelming majority of people are just trying to get through life the best way they can. I work quite a bit these days in the Middle East, and have always been made to feel welcome in those cultures. The media however would have us believe that every Muslim is eager to lop off a Christian's head at the drop of a hat.

    I agree with Free's comments to a degree, but believe it is more the fault of an overzealous media that seeks to foment fear -- more so than economic "overlords". After all, sensationalism is what sells newspapers and magazines, and gets folks to watch certain news programs. That sensationalism is rampant in both political extremes, left and right. If we could take the microphones and tv cameras away from the hatemonger Al Sharptons and Rush Limbaughs of the world, we'd all be a lot calmer -- and could get back to the business of helping each other get down the road.

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  8. Very nice poem and intro to it. I really feel that our society has lost the meaning of community as we hide behind our little glowing screens and the closed doors of our air-conditioned houses. Here’s a little something I posted yesterday on Facebook (alas, a poor substitute for real community!) about a real-life interaction I had on a visit to a small town “near” (aka, less than 50 miles) from our home:

    ---
    His motorized-lift van was parked just outside the door. I scanned the inside of the Ronnie D’s Drive-Thru and saw him sitting in his joystick wheelchair right next to the ordering counter. His head was bent down onto his sunken chest and he did not look up.

    I placed my order and then sat down in the booth next to him while my wife and kids placed theirs. I looked at him and a pair of stamped metal rectangles dangling around his neck from a chain, not staring but simply waiting until he looked up. Somehow, I knew he would, and then he did. I smiled and nodded, and his eyes held mine. “What’s the story with the dog tags?” I asked, and he told me.

    He was a Vietnam vet, U.S. Navy. I got down on one knee next to his chair to keep eye contact and hear him a little better while he spoke. I talked about my dad who escaped from a German POW camp, and he talked about his, a lieutenant colonel in the navy. His voice was quiet and muffled by the refusal of his neck to let him tilt his head upwards, but still full of words with clear thoughts behind them.

    We spoke for a few minutes and then I shook his hand. “Thank you for your service,” I said, thinking the words might mean a bit more after I’d bothered to exchange a few others with him as well. His hand still had a firm grip, moving just a bit above the tray of the wheelchair, and he nodded slightly, as well as he could.

    As I sat in my booth nearby, my young son went over and spoke to him, too. He was closer to eye level when standing, and did not need to kneel to follow his father’s example. And then he shook the man’s hand, too.

    We ate, and then sat slurping the last of our drinks from covered foam cups and shushing the kids and waiting for the last of them to eat his chicken strips. Finally, the man had spent enough time lingering near the counter listening to the chatter of human voices that were not around him at home. He steered himself over to us and pointed his eyes over at my son who had come by his chair for a visit. “I was that one’s age when I learned to swim. They threw me in the water and just waited for me to come up.”

    I smiled. “That’s the old-fashioned way of doing it, huh?” He nodded and there was a hint of a smile in the ragged old beard as he turned himself toward the door and his waiting van.

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  9. Being present in the moment and to those around us. Seeing the "other" as a fellow human being. For those of us who so believe, a fellow son or daughter created in God's image. We live in an age where we have the most access to instant information, and probably the least responsible use that information. Instead of learning about "others" our neighbors etc, our society seems to gather into groups of like minded people, and hunker in. Our political system mirrors my experience of Laestadianism in that respect. The other with other views, other beliefs etc. are to be mistrusted, feared, avoided. Politicians say ridiculous things, and people believe it because it fits what they think, whether it fits reality or not.
    Unbeliever

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  10. You all sound like Chamberlene, telling the British people, don't worry, be happy....Gramps...

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    1. Yup, hang out with that Catholic, that Buddhis, that Muslim...oh hell, even the heretics in the OALC/LLC/ABCDEFG...and you are going to hell...give satan your little finger, why...he will take all of you.
      Sounds a lot like "don't trust that commie libtard democrat/facist neonazi conservative blah blah blah, leading this country to hell in a handbasket"

      A lot different than helping the stranger, feeding the hungry etc.

      "Chamberlene" really?

      Unbeliever
      Unbeliever

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    2. I'm sorry, I took just a little poke, to see if you indeed would accept another opinion, and to see if your love thy niegbor theme was for real, oh well...

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    3. If that was aimed at me (Unbeliever), I am happy to engage in a discussion, and will do so in a respectful manner. But if the way you start conversations is to take shots at someone...
      I love my neighbor, but I expect to be treated with respect by my neighbor. My decision of who my neighbor is will not be based on whether they belong to one church or another, whether they have a different skin color than me etc.
      So if you have an opinion, and would like to discuss it...as long as the moderator graciously allows us to engage... I am a bit close minded about being told about why particular groups of people are bad...because I am not to fond of being painted with a broad brush myself
      Unbeliever

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  11. Today I talked to a woman who attended a memorial service for a lady with many OALC kin. It did my heart good to hear the service included stories told by her siblings: a true celebration of the sister whom they loved. While these siblings did not/do not all share the same faith, they love each other and respect each other. If we could all extend that kind of love to creation generally!
    Mahatma Gandhi said, "I came to the conclusion long ago … that all religions were true and also that all had some error in them, and whilst I hold by my own, I should hold others as dear as Hinduism. So we can only pray, if we are Hindus, not that a Christian should become a Hindu … But our innermost prayer should be a Hindu should be a better Hindu, a Muslim a better Muslim, a Christian a better Christian."
    By extension, a human a better human.
    Love has a way of bringing out the best in us that logic cannot touch.

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  12. I've had discussions with you over the past few years, I feel that you blow a gasket to easy, most of the time you say nice things and follow along. I know that you claim to be a unbeliever, but I think you a re a believer, but like you have said before, it's for the sake of discussion......I know that sometime. I rattle the age, so to speak, but so do other's. I mean't no malice.

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  13. The unbeliever refers to the fact that my LLC family thinks I am an "unbeliever"
    I may occasionally blow a gasket..but it is not my normal means of discourse. So what part of what I was saying strikes you as "Chamberlain-esque"?
    Unbeliever

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  14. I think I said, you all, when I mentioned Chamberlain. He insisted, and told his people, don't worry, there is no danger coming from Hitler. All the signs were there, but he refused to see them, he refused to see them, that's much like today, even on this web site. I'm really surprised.
    But, because God is a good God, He is going to give enough evidence this fall that his clock is on a certain schedule, go ahead, silence the messenger, you little old Chamberlain. It's still going to happen....now see what you have done, here comes the moderator. hee, hee, hee

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    1. I will never be silly enough to say "there is no danger" but I don't believe in (for the most part) painting entire groups of people with a broad brush. I believe in the teachings of my faith about helping the poor, the sick, the lame, the imprisoned. About loving my enemy. That wasn't some fuzzy Washington liberal, that was Jesus. I also believe that people who profess no faith are not automatically evil, just as all "Christians" are not all good. I believe that too many people attempt to create God in their image...meaning they assume that God shares their personal beliefs and biases. I believe that most if not all religious conflict and war has to do with people clinging to assumptions, claiming God is on their side (How many wars do both sides send their men into battle praying to God for victory, Telling their people that God is on their side condoning their actions) and not engaging in dialogue. However, I also have seen in history that Evil exists, and I have talked to victims of Evil, so I am not an absolute pacifist. I suspect if people of faith, indeed most people, were willing to talk about their similarities instead of their differences, things would be better.
      Unbeliever

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  15. You got that right, most people think that God is on their side, including the Laestadian movement, that's human nature. And God himself does'nt paint with a brocade brush, He calls and saves whosoever will believe His word ,and believe on and receive Jesus as Lord and Saviour. That's the bottom line.
    Religions that don't believe on Jesus, or don't want to hear the gospel are in trouble. But God is a good God He is and will continue to give warning. That's why God is showing beforehand the events of this fall. So that other religions, and all people can see that the God of the Bible is the true God. Not that we now know exactly what will happen, but all people can see, that it indeed is God's calendar, and the fulfilling of His feast days, starting in mid sept....Grumpy, gramps.....it's all written in Lev 23. We need to ask other religions, is this prophecy written in their,holy book

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    1. While I enjoy conversation, i don't enjoy proselytizing...
      Unbeliever

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  16. For the first time in my life I'm looking forward to winter, so all this nonsense about what mischief god might be up to this fall, will be in the past.

    Hephaestus

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